Monday, November 28, 2011

College Blog, by Hannah

(written on Wednesday, November 16, 2011)

I have been at Calvin College for about three months now.  It has been a whirlwind of classes, socializing, and homework...lots of homework.  Adjusting to everything at once - the climate, the US, the college atmosphere, more independence - has not been easy.  But through the chaos, I have seen God's blessing.  I am constantly exhausted, but I have seen His promise come alive.  No, I'm not miraculously alert and awake at 8 am when I got four hours of sleep, but He takes care of me.  It's all in the details.

My third or fourth week of class, I woke up at 7 am as always, but fell back asleep by accident.  I was exhausted, and could have easily slept through all four of my classes that morning.  But for some reason, I wok up half an hour later, at 7:30 am.  There was no sudden noise, no sudden light popped on, nothing to jerk me awake.  I just woke up, in just the right amount of time to get dressed, brush my teeth, make myself semi-presentable, and rush out the door.  Thank you God.

I had to pull an all-nighter a week or two ago.  A friend of mine was having some medical issues, so I stayed up with her until 5 am.  I then decided it was pointless to try and go to sleep because I would only get about an hour and a half before waking up for my 8 am Philosophy class.  That amount of sleep is just the right amount to make me exhausted and drowsy for my class, so I just stayed up.  I dozed off for about 45 minutes, got some stuff done, and then went to breakfast with a friend who stayed up with me.  I was bracing myself for a day of difficulty and exhaustion, but then saw on my French syllabus that we didn't have class on that day.  It is the only French class that is cancelled this semester, on the day that I needed it so badly.  So I got done with classes an hour early and was able to take a nap for an hour and a half.  Thank you Father.

Yesterday, my day was packed.  I had work, homework, and Gospel Choir for two hours in the evening and was exhausted (are you sensing a theme with this word?   Yeah, college is definitely as much work as they say).  I had to stay up until around one, because of a paper due today, a quiz, and homework for French.  I got up at 6:30 am, as I've recently begun to go for a quick run in the mornings - every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, hoping thatt the exercise will both wake me up and keep me in shape.  Today is a super busy day, so I was stressed about getting only fie hours or so of sleep.  Then all of a sudden, my Communication and Culture class is cancelled, as well as my French small group, giving me two extra, unexpected hours in my day.  Thank you Lord.

Lately, I am really seeing God working in the small things of my life.  An extra hour of sleep, an extra hour to study, the blessing of friends on a rough day, peace over a stressful event.  He works in all things if we give it to Him.  Too often I get caught up in the frustration and forget that He is there saying, "I am here.  I will fight this battle for you.  You do not have to deal with this by yourself.  Give it to me, I am so much more able to handle these details and love you enough to take these burdens from you." He doesn't take everything from me, but He keeps me from drowning.  He doesn't have to move a mountain to be working and He doesn't have to send a lightening bold for me to see Him.  I just have to adjust my sight.